Contrived hair do's have never gone out

When I was young we played together. Waste. A mess of the...Rampaging through the afternoons with Teresa. Teresa's on crack, Teresa has AIDS. Her bairns were sired by Edward Mental or was it 'Biddy'?. I was once told 'biddy' was German for cock. I have a small penis. I can't handle it. That's not a joke. An evening of humiliation with the stars of the Ganja Island of the early 80's. Batter folk for their trainers. Knock Flakey Michael's face off wi' one punch. Early respect for Curtis Mantronix. He's always kept it real. Real enough for Fife. Real enough to be an unobtrusive soundtrack. The war versus intelligence is nothing new. You have to be stupid to survive. Small town madmen reinvented themselves in the early 90's. A few years hence they had battered speccy boys for wearing black STA Press that were 'flordy flare'. In the post Farm world they wore million inch flares. Nothing else had changed. At the same time Billy Sloan told you about Josef K. Are Paul Quinn and Paul Haig interchangeable? They set the mold for contrivance. I KNOW A MEMBER OF BRICOLAGE. I can't quite believe it. Neither can you. In the West End is anyone fat/ugly/single/bald/in possession of a Rush LP? I can never understand. You have a White Stripes CD. Of course you like 'Brown Eyed Girl'. You have lovely hair. Are all wispy people called Gemma Hayes? Some are called Kate Rusby. I love you just the same. Did Bourgie Bourgie play Kelty Rock Club? I don't understand why you sing that way. And as for yer notion of style? There is a Kirkcaldy Legend called Bill Gimmix. He wears Harley Davidson cut offs over a bulging gut. He has no hair anymore. He used to be a staple of pub rock. I wish I had legendary status. I wish I was as impressive as that. We are measured by notions of style. These criteria are not as relative as they're made out to be.